Rules?

My marathon training plan has me running a total of 562 miles. There are four weeks until race day and I've just crossed the 80% mark in terms of completed mileage.  I may still be a novice, but I've learned a few lessons along my 452 completed training miles:

Rule #1: There is no shortcut in the training plan for a marathon.

The miles simply need to be run. This rule is sometimes in conflict with Rule #9.  Oh well.

                                 

Rule #2: Running in 50° weather is much more enjoyable than running when it is -20° outside. I’d elaborate on this rule, but if you live in Vermont, you need no further proof.

Rule #3: Bloody nipples hurt, and should be avoided. As an added bonus, the shower afterwards hurts more!  Avoid the problem, because you can’t escape the need to shower after a long run.

Add caption

A bloody Mary is

more appealing to see

than a picture of

my bloody nipples!

Rule #4: Hills are somewhat easier and more palatable to me than they used to be, but headwinds still suck.

I debated the use of the slang word “suck”, but in the end, it is the most fitting term allowable on a G-rated posting. 

Rule #5: Take nutrition on board before you think you need it. If you wait, it's too late. The same logic applies to fluids as well. Although there is something to be said for the hallucinations that accompany hypoglycemia.

They make for interesting conversation with imaginary running partners.

Rule #6: When you've completed long mileage on the Burlington Waterfront, and you're amazed that the girls are still smiling at you... Remember, they're only smiling because you have chocolate Gu smeared on your face (and probably on your shirt too). 

There is just no easy way to finesse the Gu out of the packet without making a mess!   

Rule #7: Age 48 is not the optimal time to begin marathon training. I can now complete 20 miles, but I can't touch my toes.

Rule #8: The comedian Steven Wright says that "everywhere is walking distance, if you have the time."  The

same rule applies to running. No distance is too far.  

Of course I should wait until I complete my 26.2 miles before saying this too loudly.

Rule #9: Running is supposed to be fun. 

If it isn’t fun, you’re doing something wrong.

Rule #10: Miles go faster when you have a running partner.  After all, whining about pain and exhaustion is no fun without someone to hear you! 

Of course, all of these rules may be wrong… I am still a rookie after all!

And by the way, for those who have been reading my blog since my first one- I’ve been practicing (far from other people) and I'm finally getting pretty good at the "snot rocket!"

Until next week,

Greg